Kindness is #WhyIYoga

People find yoga at many different stages in life.  For CorePower Yoga Studio Manager Megan Webster, she found it at a critical time – while she was fighting a long battle with Bulimia.

“I spent my childhood on the ice rink. I was a competitive figure skater, and lived at the rink.  I was home-schooled there and practiced more than 6 hours a day.”  

She remembers one morning session when she was about ten years old, watching a few other skaters practicing their jumps.  “They could jump so high, and I asked the coach how they did that.”

Megan’s coach told her that the lighter girls could jump higher.  Later, she asked her mom what the coach meant by that.  “She told me they were skinnier.  That was the catalyst for me. What I heard was, ‘If I’m thinner, I’ll be better.’”  

An injury ended Megan’s figure skating career at the age of twelve. But the impact of that moment stayed with her beyond her young figure skating career, and set her on a path of self-destruction.

“Between my junior and senior years in high school it got really bad.  My doctor and therapist were adamant I go into therapy, but I begged them to wait until I’d completed my college applications, and I promised I could keep it in control. Well, the college admissions process nearly broke me.  I weighed 97 pounds and at 18, I entered an outpatient treatment center.”

Megan first discovered yoga during her treatment.  It didn’t stick, though. “When I could go three weeks without purging, I was allowed to participate in light exercise and yoga was one option. I was so excited to move my body, but I hated the class,” Megan remembers. “I think we did one sun salutation and the rest of the 60 minutes we were sitting down. I was so bored.”

For years following treatment, Megan still fought the battle that began when she was only eleven.  “I thought I was healthier, but I felt like nobody understood me.  I would see people looking at me, realistically because of how sick I looked, and I convinced myself they were judging me for eating that granola bar.”

Then, a friend dragged her to a CorePower Yoga class. At this point, Megan was 26 years old, and while she told herself she had the bulimia under control, she was still purging one or two times a day.  “I didn’t want to go.  I had done yoga and I didn’t like it. She bribed me with tacos and margaritas after.”  

Megan came to the class with a negative energy and low expectations, but the class was nothing like she expected.  The music was uplifting and fun and she felt a connection to a larger community. “During the class, I thought I was going to die. My body was screaming, but those screaming body parts made me feel so alive!”  

But it wasn’t just the physical yoga practice that helped set Megan on a path to healing; the teachers and the sense of community were huge factors.  “The instructors noticed me.  They acknowledged me and showed genuine care. I knew I had found my home.”  

Soon after her first CorePower class, Megan’s father passed away.  Devastated, she turned to her yoga mat. “I don’t mean to be melodramatic, but without yoga my father’s death would have triggered a relapse. By that point, I had stressed my heart and had done so much damage to my esophageal muscle that I’m not sure I would have survived.”

Now, as a CorePower Yoga instructor and studio manager, Megan knows the healing power of yoga and also of kindness.  “I don’t know what my students are going through in their lives; what battles they are fighting.  But I can offer a kind word or two, and provide space for them to be a part of something positive. I admit my battle is not over.  I still work everyday to be kind to myself, and I want to be an example for my students and most importantly for my daughter.”

Megan Webster

Shattuck & Berkeley West General Manager